Saturday night I went over to the West Side and ended up smoking cigars with a few friends on the boardwalk in Santa Monica when a homeless guy approached us asking for money. I told him I didn't have any to spare but I could offer him a cigar. He said he wanted money but shouldn't turn down a cigar. He then proceeded to question me about what I did for a living. In retrospect, he was trying to figure out why I wouldn't give him a dollar. We finished up and decided to go elsewhere, and after we walked maybe 10 yards the homeless guy started cussing me out because it was clear we weren't going to give him anything else. I decided to just keep walking, and after we walked about another half block someone else in the group (who knows what happened to me) commented on karma. A couple of people in our group didn't know what my friend Reinhold was referring to so I told them about what happened to me.
It didn't even occur to me until earlier today (3 days later) to be outraged about it. I mean. I've been feeding the homeless once a week for a number of years despite have suffered a near fatal attack doing so two years ago. But I think it *should* be that way; I do what I do because I enjoy it. Most significantly, it did not occur to me to claim that, for want of a better way of putting it, that I'd already done enough to earn my philanthropy merit badge which I wear on the side on my neck,
I guess the bottom line is that I feel like this is proof that I've reached a level of closure that allows me to move on.
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